Correction de mon anglais

Correction de mon anglais - Aide aux devoirs - Emploi & Etudes

Marsh Posté le 09-09-2007 à 10:30:25    

BOnjour à tous, donc voila je dois faire une presentation rapide d'une amie, je n'ai pas un bon niveau en anglais, malheureusement pour moi... si vous pouviez me corriger ceci et si vous avez des idées à rajouter, de ce que je pourrais dire en plus sur elle..:
Her name is Anissa Gouchene
She was born on twenty-two of May in nineteen ninety .
 She is seventeen years old.  
She has got  two small sisters: Melissa, thirteen years old and Maeva, ten years old.
she lives in alès with her parents. His father is artisan boilermaker and his mother childminder.  
She hasn't got animals
. She was never been  to England.  
Her main passion is the photograph.  
And phobia is snakes.  
She is very sociable, very in listening; with a a fort tempered
 
 
Merci beaucoup..


---------------
Pauline
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Marsh Posté le 09-09-2007 à 10:30:25   

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Marsh Posté le 09-09-2007 à 11:11:08    

Her father is an artisan boilermaker and his mother a childminder.  
She hasn't got pets. ( = animaux de compagnie)
She has never been  to England.   ( = bilan donc present perfect)
Her main passion is photography.  

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Marsh Posté le 09-09-2007 à 11:41:35    

MErci, si quelqu'un trouve d'autres fautes...

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Marsh Posté le 09-09-2007 à 13:22:45    

Mais c'est un peu naze ces phrases a la suite sans transitions..

 

Voici ma version remasterisée:

 
Citation :

Anissa Gouchene is 17 years old, she was born in May, 22th, 1990. She lives with her parents and her two younger sisters (Melissa, 13, and Maeva, 10) in the city of Alès. Her father is artisan boilermaker while her mother is childminder. She has no pets.
Anissa has never been to England before. Her main hobby is photography, she hates snakes, is very sociable and is a good listener.

 

Maintenant, qu'est-ce qu'on en a a faire qu'elle deteste les serpents...
Toi seul le sait.


Message édité par Profil supprimé le 09-09-2007 à 13:25:39
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